Break Up to Make Up

*** "Fuck you, Yo," she screamed as she rushed out the door. Without hesitation, I was in close pursuit.

"But Nic, I swear to God it wasn't like that!" She stopped in her tracks and turned to me. The look in her eyes was cold. In all my years of knowing her, I'd never ever seen that look in her eyes.

"What the fuck was it then? Huh?" I guess that question was rhetorical because she gave me no time to answer. "You laid up in my house. No, wait…our house wit some lame ass nigga, and the only thing you can tell me is it wasn't like that!" Once again, she gave me no time to give her any type of reply, and she began to walk away from me. As she made her way to her truck, she began to throw words at me that were just as cold as her stare. "I took you away from the bullshit. I did! I brought you here so you could be happy. So we could be happy together, and this is how you muthafuckin repay me?" By the time she finished her sentence she had reached her truck and so had I. I reached out to touch her,

"But Baby, I swear to you." Before I could finish, she jerked away from me.

"Get the fuck off me. Go run back in there to yo bitch. I'm out." My body froze. I felt hot and cold all at the same time. I just knew in my mind that this all was a dream, and I was going to wake up and we would be in our bed holding one another. When I spoke, the feeling and the reality only got worse.

"What you mean you out?"

"Dis crib and ya life, Mama. Looks like you doing good without me." My heart stopped. My lungs were now contracting and relaxing inside my throat, and endless tears were falling from my face and onto the pavement beneath me. I couldn't move. I couldn't speak. All I could do was watch as the only thing I had in this world drove away without me in hers.

*** Nicole and I have been together for almost seven years now. We would actually make seven years in two days. We met both straight out of high school, but we were deeply in love. We were from two very different worlds, but that didn't discourage her one bit. It only motivated her to love me more, and intrigued her enough to want to learn as much about me there was to know. When things got bad, she was there. When things got worse, she saved me. When it was time for her to go to college, she took me with her. She made sure I had a roof over my head, food in my mouth, and anything else I needed until I got on my own two feet, and even then, she made sure I would want for nothing. Nicole was my angel, my savior, my…everything, and I wouldn't think of putting anyone but God before her. It pained every inch of me to know that I had lost her because I had been so careless, and not even in a bad way. It also pained me to know that she believed I would hurt her in any way.

*** When we first moved into the complex, our first friendly neighbor was a nice looking young stud from the building across from us named Shy. She had seen us unloading our things the day we moved in, and instead of watching, she opted to lend a hand. From then on, she was a much-needed friend in a new place for the both of us. We all spent a lot of time together, but when school started for Nicole, it quickly became just Shy and me. From the outside looking in, Shy and I did spend too much time together. In my mind, it was innocent, but Shy had other plans.

*** Shy and I had been together the whole day. If I wasn't working, I was anxiously awaiting Nic to come home. So, Shy's frequent company didn't bother me. It was almost time for Nicole to come home. As usual, I fixed dinner then went to get in the shower. When I came out, being that I was only in a towel, I ran straight into our room, but I was stopped in my tracks by Shy who was lying in the bed in only her sports bra and boxers.

"What the hell are you doing?" I don't know which one was thicker in my voice: aggravation, frustration, or pure amazement.

"I'm tryna do you if you come on before yo old lady gets home." I began to pick up her clothes that she had dropped on the floor and threw them at her one by one.

"You have lost your eva-loven-fucken mind if you think for one second I'm about to get down witchu in me and my boo's bed. Ha, bitch you trippin!" I threw the last of her clothing at her then pointed to the door. "You can take you and yo shit right on across that breeze-way and go home." She didn't say anything in reply or rejection so I thought I had gotten my point across. In silence, she began walking towards the door, but when she reached me, she dropped her things and slung me on the bed. Shy slung me so fast and hard, that my towel flew open and fell to the floor. Before I had a chance to get myself back together, Shy was lying on top of me.

"Stop fighting it. You know you want me, Ma. That nigga of your always gone so I know she ain't giving you what I can." Her strength outmatched my own by a long shot. I struggled to get from under her periodically telling her to get the hell off of me. Just when I thought shit could get no worse, Nicole walked through the door and damn near dropped dead when she saw us lying there.

*** Needless to say, it got bad. Then she walked out. Another thing that pisses me off is that Shy's ass didn't even have the balls to stick around and admit it was all nothing. Now, I'm sitting here almost two days later. Still thinking to myself that this shit isn't real. I have tried countless times to call and talk to Nic, but she wasn't having it. If I was lucky, I got her voicemail, and I was able to leave a message. Most of the time, she didn't even bother to give me that. She'd just pick up the phone and hang it right back up in my face. I once again, accepted my defeat and cried myself to sleep.

*** It was about one in the morning when I was awakened from my sleep by the sound of keys rattling at the door. I already knew it was Nicole, but fear and nervousness struck my body. When she walked through the door, our eyes met. I was put at ease because that cold stare was no longer there. That infamous stare that had almost put me to my death a few days ago had vanished. So, with a little bit of hope stricken in my heart, I tried to speak.

"What are you…"? She cut me off before I could even finish. In her stride to the bedroom, she replied,

"I'm just here to get my shit, and no, I don't need any help so don't bother coming back here." I sat back and sunk right back into the seat in which had become my prison. My tears once again consumed me as I listened to her movements around the room that we once shared. I began to think about the look in her eyes when she walked through the door. That look gave me hope. It made me believe I still had a chance. So, overcoming a fear over an even bigger fear, I ran to try and salvage the rest of my life.

*** "You at least owe me a chance to explain myself, Nic." She didn't even bother looking at me. She just stopped what she was doing. So, I continued. "I would never dream of cheating on you, Nicole. You should know that. I love you too much for that. You are all I got. You are literally my everything and I don't want that to change!" When she got up and started walking towards me, the first kind of fear came back. I saw that look in her eyes again, and I thought that heffa was about to fuck me up, but she didn't. At least not how I thought she was about to.

*** Nicole rushed into me pushing me against the wall kissing me deep and hard. She vigorously bit and sucked on my lips and tongue. She lowered her violent kisses to my neck where she sunk her teeth so deep into me I thought she was going to draw blood. I let out a pain filled moan while I dug my fingernails into the back of Nic's neck. For some odd reason, everything Nic was doing was turning me on more than I have ever been turned on before. Nic began squeezing and pinching on my nipples causing my moans to become louder.

*** She then jerked me away from the wall slinging me onto the bed simultaneously ripping my shirt apart. I never slept fully clothed. So, immediately my breasts were exposed, and I lay there in only my panties. Nicole went straight for my breasts. She sucked on them hard and bit on my nipples like a newborn grizzly cub. Sharp pains were going through my body, but at the same time my body had never felt so good. Without letting go of my breasts, Nic ripped off my panties and threw them to the side. Four-play was nowhere near Nicole's agenda. She went straight to my pussy and dived in like a starving man on a Christmas ham. I've never had to complain about Nic's mouthpiece. Hell, sometimes I had to even question how could one person be so damn good at it, but this was different. It felt completely different. Nicole fucked me with her tongue as hard and as deep as her tongue would allow. When she sucked on my clit, I could feel the sensation all in my scalp. My moans were bouncing from one wall to another and retreating to the middle of the room. Before I knew it, I was bouncing and jerking as my thick juices flowed into Nicole's mouth.

*** She got up leaving me there to overcome the pleasurable pain she had just subjected me to. I thought it was over. I thought she was about to walk away, but before my mind could even grasp everything that had just happened, Nicole had my legs on her shoulders and had entered me with her strap. There was no transition from slow and easy to deep and hard. It was all deep, fast, and hard. I was too caught up in the depths of ecstasy to moan. I just kept my eyes shut tight and held on to the disheveled covers on our bed.

*** Nicole watched me as she punished me. Studied my every expression but was still not pleased. Suddenly, she removed her strap and flipped me over onto my stomach and pulled my ass up to her. Now this, she was much more precise. Much more focused. She took her strap and rubbed it up and down my pussy then pushed deep inside me and pulling out only to repeat her silent torture. It didn't take but a few times for me to figure out that she wanted me to beg. Usually, I'm not one to entertain her power strokes, but if she kept this up, she was going to get just what she was looking for. She repeated her ritual a few more times only now quickening her pace. I couldn't take it anymore. So, I gave her exactly what she was waiting on.

"Fuck me, Please, Baby. I just want you to fuck me right now!" She must have been satisfied by my plea because my wish became her command. She started to fuck me so hard, my moans were mixed with the rhythm of our bodies slapping together. I was lost somewhere between never and forever and was caught up trying to find a happy medium as I felt her strap being drilled into me with everything she had.

"Whose pussy is this?" She leaned forward and asked me. I was quickly running out of strength. So, slightly above a whisper, I said,

"Yours." My reply lacked enthusiasm. It lacked excitement, but Nicole knocked some right into me when she reached back and slapped me on my ass. This sound echoing fiercely through the air. "Its yours!" I yelled as loud as I could, but to my dismay this still wasn't enough. She wrapped her fingers inside my hair, pulled me back to her then smacked me on my ass as hard as she could and asked me again,

"Whose pussy is this?"

"Its yours, Daddy. Nobody's but yours!" Nicole pulled her strap completely out of me then re-entered me with so much force my body went numb. In those few seconds, I knew what it felt like to be put to death by the electric chair. Everything from my toenails to the ends of my hair, jolted with orgasmic bliss.

*** Nicole let me go allowing my body to fall limp onto the bed. As I watched the sun rise through the window, I felt the weight of her body on top of me, which was a welcomed feeling. She removed my hair from my face, kissed me on my cheek then whispered,

"Happy Anniversary, Mama."

"I thought we wasn't gonna make it. I thought you were gone for good."

"I never doubted you for a second, Boo. I know you wouldn't fuck around on me." I slid from under her so that I could look her in the face.

"So, why'd you leave?"

"Create suspense." I sat up and screamed,

"What the fuck?" She started to laugh then explained.

"You remember when we were talking that night after we had just made like the best love, and you told me fucking after arguing is the best? I just wanted to give you that. Hell, Ma, we don't argue. We barely disagree on shit. So, I set this up so we could have a great eight year introduction."

"Wait, so dat shit wit Shy wasn't for real?" She looked at me and laughed.

"Hell, naa! Where you think I had been for the past two days?" I hit her across her arm as hard as I could.

"I'm kicking both of yall's asses for this." She grabbed me by my arm pulling me back down beside her.

"I love you too, Woman!" I lay there beside her and allowed silence to sweep across the air that had just released the sounds of pain and pleasure. It took us both no time to fall asleep.

*** I woke up stretching and yawning. When I looked over at the clock, I could have kicked my own ass when I saw that it read 1:23p.m. I'm surprised Nic didn't wake me up for breakfast. I always made it my business to start her day off right. I got up out of bed and began to stir around and get a late start on my day. Before I left the room I spotted a small box on the dresser with a note attached.

For seven years, I have awaken beside what I've always looked to be a dream. I watched you sleep today and was nothing short of breathless. I love you, Baby, and I wouldn't dream of spending another year and many more to come with no one other than you!!!

Needless to say, I was in tears. I opened the box and there sat staring at me was a white gold, princess cut, past present and future diamond ring with a rainbow set in the middle of the middle diamond, and what amazed me most of all, engraved inside the band was the words my everything.